Just a forewarning. Dec 1, 2013 22:44:44 GMT -5
Post by Mallory on Dec 1, 2013 22:44:44 GMT -5
So I know I posted about wanting to get active again. And I mean it - I'm going to try my hardest. However, things have come up that are demanding my attention for the sake of my well being.
I haven't wanted to admit it for the last few weeks, but I've relapsed with my eating disorder. This bout is a lot worse than the last few I've had; I haven't been able to shake it off and recover within a short period of time like I thought I would. It was triggered by some unfortunate things from class, or so I believe, and then stress made it worse.
And on top of that, when things seemed like they would get better, I had relationship problems to make it worse again. Even though I saw it coming, a break up did occur and no matter how much I tried to prepare myself for it, it still hurt and only added to the downward spiral my eating habits was taking. Thus, I'm having to severely fight with myself to even eat anything at all - which means my roommate is watching me, making sure I eat, because she knows and understands that some times I need help. And this is one of those times. I've already lost around 15 lbs; I cannot afford to lose more because I wasn't even near my optimum weight to begin with.
I will be on often to do adminly duties and to chat, but I'm not certain how my muse will be affected by the effects of my break-up over the next week or so and my relapse. So just be patient.
I will be here to do the activity check, so DO IT! Just don't pester me with plotting or posts until I feel 100% up to it.